Joke Collection No. 2

[INTRO]Cleaning her twentieth fish in the kitchen, a wife irritably says to her fisherman husband:
- I'm begging you like a human being! When you go fishing, DRINK VODKA!!!

Ad: Fishing tackle for sale. If a man answers, say you've got the wrong number...
[/INTRO]

- Do you drink vodka?
- No.
- Then what do you do with it?

A woman who has never seen her husband fishing will never know what a patient man she married.

A guy is walking through the forest. Tipsy. Suddenly a moose charges at him and knocks him to the ground.
He's just getting up when a bear comes running after the moose, knocks him down again and, without even noticing, keeps running. The guy, now angry, jerks himself up and sees a hare running at him. He starts grinning gleefully... A second later he's on the ground and the hare is running off.
And then a voice rings out from the heavens:
- Hey, buddy! Maybe you should step away from the merry-go-round...

Two fishermen have been sitting on the bank for hours, not a single bite.
A crucian carp pokes its head out, red face, huge red eyes, hoarse voice:
- guys, what are you waiting for?
- a bite...
with anguish:
- there won't be any biting. the biting was yesterday...

— So how was your vacation?
— Same as at work. You sit, do nothing and wait for lunch.